Picture this. Clear skies, negative 30 degrees and mountains that brush elbows with god. Mix in the world’s finest and most fearless professional snow mobilers, and you have the wildest adventure I could ever dream up. The video was a long time coming for me and the fine folks at Ferret delivered us the goods. We had A really great time collaborating with Soren on the visual concept. Basically, we all rode back into Hatcher’s Pass and shot all the riders doing their thing as well as all our friends partying in the parking lot of the State park. Lyrically I took a fist-in-the-air approach to the song to express that never give in mentality. Definitely it was the greatest time we have ever had making a video.

Click “more” to watch “We Gave it Hell”

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Awwwww, little white tourists in Shanghai. Wow! China is really neat.Look at all those pretty buildings! I thought it was going to be a pile of garbage. If you zoom into this picture you can peep at our brand new $2 Rolexes and my $3 Armani shirt I picked up at the “Rape Escape Shopping Center,” which was, like, six floors of 20 rows of two foot alleys of bootleg clothing, where, if you’re white, 15 Chinese people follow you around screaming in your ear and trying to take you by the hand to their store behind the building. Our video guy got attacked by a lady with no nose.

Oh, spicy food? Yeah, we eat that. “Hot pot?” Yeah, I’ll bet that’s real hot, Chinese guy. We live next to f–king Mexico. We’ve been to Thailand. Kung Pao Chicken at Panda Express. Heard of it? I can eat, like, five pieces at the same time. Del Scorcho Sauce. I can handle anything. Oh is there a feather on my tongue? Is there some lukewarm wa- uh-oh! Ha-ha. Ha. Uh… Haha. Yeah, this is kind of olllllll nuhhhh nuh nuhhhhh pffffpfptptpptpfp AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

Bikes come in many forms in China. And some people just ride wheelchairs.

We’re on a dock floating in the Yangtze River in Wuhan (population six million) waiting for a ferry so we can cross the river. That’s the toilet. Under the toilet you can see the river. Also note the moldy s— threads hanging down.

And here is the dude swimming in the river a couple hundred feet downstream from the plumbing system in the last picture. Check out his buddies who made a day of watching their friend splash diarrhea on his face and armpits. Maybe they don’t even know him and this is just the most entertaining guy in China.

Show in Ning Bo. Four million people call Ning Bo their personal hell. That’s as big as L.A. Heard of it? Oh wait, you’ve been to Hawaii and Walmart, you know exactly what I’m talking about. I forgot. As you can see, we managed to draw .0015% of the population, a total failure. We played out of practice amps. Dudes showed up in suits with dates in evening gowns and ordered dinner at tables while watching us play. The moshing looked like the precursor to slam-dancing. I don’t think they even had invented video cameras yet to document that stage of the American scene.

We took a night train from Shanghai to Wuhan. We woke up naked and we were the last people on the train. Some Chinese were yelling at us to get off. We had all 1,000 pounds of our s— and had to carry it, like, a mile up these four story staircases, like, four times. Then, we took a long path through a bunch of Chinese people just standing on the side of it all day. The path ends. We see the main street. But at the end of the path is a 100 foot stretch of rubble. It literally looked like a bomb had gone off. And people were walking through the rubble. My rolly carry on luggage doesn’t roll through f–kng rubble.

Here’s a Dick Van Dyke walking through rubble (in China you see the same dude following you all day. For us it was this skinny Dick-Van-Dyke-in-”Mary-Poppins”-looking dude wearing a dirty encrusted skinny leg suit with the most disturbing vacant look in his eye) These dudes are literally one-third of the population of China and their job is to walk around smiling all day in their suit and get it dirtier by walking through rubble, when possible.

Oh s—, here’s something unexpected. People living in rubble. “Oh my f–k. God, I live here! Where is George Bush?” This chick’s life is probably even more bottom-of-the-barrel than pictured as the probability that she is sitting on a used diaper or a chicken foot or someone’s freeblow snot or a puddle of a child’s urine is nearly certain.

But seriously, even though china has some of the s—tiest things I’ve ever seen in my life, it was by far the most interesting place we went on the tour and I would go back in a second. Everything truly is different — not like Europe or Japan. You truly escape to a different place. It’s easy to talk s—, but at the same time it’s rad and definitely something a lot of people living in the bubble have to see. So, no hard feelings China. We love you.

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From now on, we’re giving you guys a chance to help pick the video lineups for Headbangers Ball. A couple days ago, we listed last week’s show lineup and asked you to chose who you wanted to see back again on this Saturday’s episode. The majority of votes went to newbie thrash band Warbringer’s video for “Combat Shock,” so we’ll air that sucker again. A number of votes also went to Behemoth’s “At the Left Hand Ov God,” so look for that as well.

But here’s a sneak preview of the Warbringer for those of you that just can’t wait:

And check out our interview with the band. <p>

If you’re still with us, here’s singer John Kevill’s guest blog about his favorite thrash albums of all time.

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We have all seen Jimi Henrix rockin’ out, and it’s a sight to behold. And everyone knows the guitar god did a lot of rockin’ in-and-out- and-in-and-out with any number of lovely ladies, but no one but his privileged “band of gypsies” have been witness to that — until now.

Today, Vivid Video released the controversial DVD “Jimi Hendrix The Sex Tape,” and while the Hendrix estate has insisted the actor getting the cock-a-doodle-do from two ’60s babes isn’t actually Jimi, the adult film company is so confident in the authenticity of their product that they’ve offered $100,000 to anyone who can prove it’s a fake or that it’s someone else.

The controversy over the tape escalated after the Hendrix estate, Experience Hendrix, publicly denied the tape actually showed Hendrix having sex with the unidentified brunettes. Vivid co-Chairman Steven Hirsch took umbrage to that, replying, “The press release statement from Experience Hendrix proves nothing. Vivid took considerable time and spent a substantial sum of money to authenticate the footage and we are very comfortable that this is the real thing. We believe that those who say otherwise are relying on their emotions to make unsubstantiated claims. If Experience Hendrix can prove definitively that it’s not Jimi Hendrix on this footage then we will pay them $100,000.”

Click more to read more and watch an adult-oriented preview of the naughty DVD (Please, no one under 18).

Vivid notes that some of the so-called experts that have stepped forward to comment on the authenticity of the footage have never even met Hendrix. Meanwhile, a former close associate of the musician, who was with him almost every day for two full years says there is no doubt the controversial tape depicts the late rock ‘n roll icon having sex with the women, the company said in a press release.

“I’m positive that we are viewing the real Jimi Hendrix,” said Neville Chesters, road manager for Hendrix in the late 60s after viewing “Jimi Hendrix The Sex Tape.” “We were all jealous of Jimi’s sex life at the time and we were accustomed to seeing him frequently go to his room at night with an entourage of women we called his ‘Band of Gypsys,’ the same name of his 1969 recording,” added Chesters, who also worked with other famous rock groups such as The Who and Cream.

“The late Sixties were socially, sexually and politically charged times. The footage in the Vivid movie looks as if it was shot in about 1968. It would have been difficult to get explicit film processed commercially in the U.S. back then, no less of a bi-racial sex act. So this film was probably developed in Germany and kept hidden because of how incendiary its release could have been.”

Cynthia (Plaster Caster) Albritton, one of the experts who authenticated the footage and, who once held Hendrix’s penis in her hands while she made a plaster cast of it, said she is certain that those are Hendrix’s manly bits on the tape. “No one can pay me any amount of money to say I saw something I didn’t see,” Albritton told Vivid last week. “Judging from having casted Jimi, in addition to looking at some old photos of him recently, I’m convinced that he is indeed the man seen in this film. Facial aspects such as the muscle around his mouth, the lips, eyebrows and mustache, look like those of Jimi. The angle of the camera somewhat alters his face, which explains why the first few seconds seen in a trailer before the Vivid feature was released has caused some confusion. Also, the hairstyle, body mass, and absence of acne scars make me think that the film was made during the last year of his life.”

Albritton also disputed a claim by Hendrix’ girlfriend Kathy Etchingham that the 8 mm film was not authentic. “Kathy had only seen stills of the film - not the actual tape which is much clearer.” Kathy herself is quoted in the late Curtis Knight’s authoritative 1973 book (”An Intimate Biography of Jimi Hendrix”) as saying about Jimi, ‘He went really crazy about cinefilming,’ she said. ‘He would also get friends of his to film naked women running around his room.’ “I think Kathy still has a hard time talking about Jimi doing all these things and facing the fact that he had other women. It sounds to me that she is still smarting from the pain of memories that he was not always faithful to her.”

Now move over, Rover and let Jimi take over.

Link to Preview of Jimi Hendrix Sextape

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EMPOWER YOURSELF
Anyone who reads this blawg with any regularity might remember the last time I constructed a quick feast (for those of us who suffer from any sort of attention deficit disorder) where I scribed a bunch of quick paragraphs and centered one on the idea of RESPECT. Well, recent activities have jolted my consciousness to a state of urgent lucidity. Allow me to clarify a thing or three. Now, I still believe any decent living soul should offer respect to all those who have EARNED it, but if I may elaborate on that to state that this gift should be rescinded if the other entity is not reciprocal and their behavior violates your liberty.

A few nights ago, we dove heart-first into the crusty bowels of the bible belt where sisters are porked, Jesus is white, the earth is flat (& only 6000 years old), Bush is right, Jagermeister & chewin’ tobacky are essential food groups, denying scientific truth is celebrated, overalls are formal wear, fear tactics brutalize and influence the weak, and (of course) on every tongue is an undying belief that the world is safe (and pure) as long as free-thinking & free expression are smothered to a minimum.

It was a Sunday night in Abilene and the promoter of the show had moved us to an outdoor stage in the back of the venue. It was a last minute addition to the tour (to replace the cancelled Lubbock show after the club lost its liquor license) so we weren’t expecting a huge crowd but the outdoor stage looked like it would be fun and we were ready for anything. About an hour before the show, we were told the cops had warned our Tour Manager that we were to keep the volume down and no cursing was to be allowed on stage.

I listened, I smiled, and a devilish twinkle flashed in my American eye.

I remember walking out on stage and seeing the hopeful faces of our audience. I remember feeling their warmth, overcome by the power of their screams, touched by the passion for our music. And I remember looking out and seeing the dark shirts of the mustached, cropped-haired police officers, their eyes (filled with fear and disgust) shooting daggers at me in icy stares that sought to destroy me with every passing moment.

The show erupted with the first song and any hope the “official authorities” (aka moral police) might have had of a peaceful, god-fearing, safe-fest ended quickly and violently. Before the second song began, I addressed the crowd and told them what I knew of the limits and restrictions that were placed on us. I told them, “I understand that Abilene is supposed to be the big ole buckle of the Bible-belt, but this is still f–king America!! Land of the FREE! And though I am not a Republican or a Christian, I am still a certified, card-f–king-carrying, proud American citizen protected by the f–king First Amendment of the United States Constitution which governs FREEDOM OF f–king SPEECH!”

Amendment 1 - Freedom of Religion, Press, Expression.
Ratified 12/15/1791.

Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.

(Writers Note: It occurs to me that this entry is a grand paradox as the editors of this blog tend to censor curse words. Oh, the horrors of contradictions! Well, feel free to leave all the smug, pug-ugly comments you want. It seems, in this case, to be extremely and excessively warranted. But I digress.)

Well, they didn’t like that one bit and soon cut the PA speakers. I noticed the sound level drop so I kicked over the monitor speakers (that we use on stage) toward the audience and we finished the show. It might have sounded like a local band at a State Fair, but we did the best we could with the circumstances presented to us. The cops came looking to intimidate us — but we had the law on our side and in the end, we were victorious.

“We’re here, we’re weird!! Get used to it!!”

I am proud of everyone who came to the show despite the best efforts of the moral police. Feed your head everyone. Know your rights. Know and VOTE.

Empower yourself.

CROOKED SPOONS
A new video, you say?? Crooked Spoons on every wall, you say??? INDEED FRIENDS!! We are proud to announce that a new video for Crooked Spoons will be unleashed on May 15th! We are honored that Headbangers Ball will be the first to WORLD PREMIER the video! It will include live footage and dramatized expositions from the new film by Thomas Mignone called ON THE DOLL. We are very proud of this video and this song is one my all time favorites.

PILLS & PANACEA
Many have asked, and now it is known. Art has saved me and this is truth. But there are times when I have succumbed to my own fears and frustrations, slipped into a strange world where if one pill could do the trick, then 6 must be better. A place where it is easier to numb my affliction than actively work on making it go away. It is no secret that I have had my bouts with anxiety and depression. Nor is it any secret (though, at times, disappointing) that I sometimes enjoy (a little too much) the bliss the pills can conjure. We are told to pill our pain away, a quick fix for a systemic affliction. On every channel, on every hour, we are saturated with commercials and promotions of new medications and narcotics that can swoop in and save the day! The song Noose & Nail (on our new album) describes my plight (and certain members of my family) with this conflict. It is a typical American story of self-medicating and over-medicating. I am not proud of it but it, too, is truth.

MALLS & HOT TOPIC
When we tour our off-days become holy days where we finally find time to ourselves and can turn off the world and just exist. The guys do their thing while I (usually) seek out a large shopping mall (with a bookstore and a GNC) so that I can walk and walk and walk (be anonymous) and be alone with the emptiness of consumerism. I will usually find a nail salon and get a manicure (short and shiny - no color) and pedicure (tour feet are not a pretty sight) then move on to GNC for a quick check of protein powders, aroma therapies, and all varieties of health food. If I’m lucky, there will be one of those chair massage kiosks and I will spend 22 minutes getting my back and neck worked on to combat the rigors of ritualization. Next, I enter the Shangri La of my day — a book store. I will spend hours seeking, searching, feeding, feasting, and escaping in the words of poets, philosophers, authors, et al. Here, I find bliss. Words feed my head. Kisses on my soul. Spiritual intercourse just for me.

If the mall has a Hot Topic, I will give it a look for any new jewelry or novelty items they may have (and to see if they carry our album and shirts). I know some of you wisenheimers have a strong distaste for Hot Topic, but I deem it admirable. What other national retail chain supports, endorses, and focuses (solely) on the counter-culture? None that I can think of. Hot Topic helps bands get noticed when (most of) these record labels do little to nothing with regards to promo or exposure. Is there a risk of trivializing the culture? Sure, but it’s worth the risk if some squiggle in small town USA wants to break free of the square mentality. And as we slip further into the sick of a pop-vomit culture, at least there’s a store out there where you can get a spiked bracelet, high-heeled sneakers, a Nirvana t-shirt, some Family Guy doodads, a nipple ring (or 3), hair dye, a velvet vampire journal, goth pants (with those weird hook-on strap type thingies), a skinny black tie, skinny black jeans, overly colorful shirts and blouses, living dead dolls, domo-kun, patches, zombie devil duckies, wickedly witty buttons with phrases like “THE ONLY BUSH I TRUST IS MY OWN”, cheap corsets, fingerless gloves, SWEENEY TODD tote bags, NAPOLEON DYNAMITE accessories, plaid mini-skirts, neon plum nail polish, INVADER ZIM shoelaces, sweet scene-ster bandanas, suspenders, & sunglasses, 4 foot wallet chains, and (of course) all sorts of A Nightmare Before Christmas merchandise, thinga-ma-bobs, whatcha-hoozits, and doohickies. I mean, seriously. It’s gold, Jerry. Gold!

OTEP TOUR - THE CIRCUS OF DEMOCRACY
May 10 — The Whisky, Los Angeles, California (8 p.m.)
May 11 — The Boardwalk, Orangevale, California (6 p.m.)
May 13 — Club Underground, Reno, Nevada (8 p.m.)
May 15 — Rock N Roll Pizza, Portland, Oregon (6:30 p.m.)
May 16 — El Corazon, Seattle, Washington (8 p.m.)
May 17 — The Big Easy Concert Hall, Spokane, Washington (8 p.m.)
May 18 — The Big Easy Concert Hall, Boise, Idaho (8 p.m.)

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Shot by an opinionated teenage extreme metal fan from Douglasville, Georgia, “Metalheads” attempts to explore the sociology and appeal of heavy metal through documentary-style narrative, and interviews with the kid’s friends, classmates and a non-conformist Alexander High School social studies professor who used to be in Army Special Ops.

Throughout the 18-minute flick, Hughes addresses what he sees as real metal (Arsis, Callenish Circle, Kataklysm) and what people mistake for metal (Korn, Sevendust, Limp Bizkit). He also expresses his contempt for “hardcore” (though his example of hardcore is the now defunct metalcore band “I Killed the Prom Queen”; chances are, he’s never heard of Minor Threat, Agnostic Front or Murphy’s Law).

Still, Hughes, who looks more like a jock than a headbanger, has a lot of heart, and through sheer determination and audacity, he’s managed to pay tribute to his favorite music while inadvertently creating a film that’s as funny as “Heavy Metal Parking Lot.”

Plus, “Metalheads” features some pretty brutal background music, including songs by Dimmu Borgir, Abigail Williams, Slayer, The Human Abstract, Cryptopsy, Nile, Meshuggah and Dark Tranquillity. In all likelihood, none of this stuff was actually cleared before Hughes posted his short film on the Net, but such is the nature of guerilla filmmaking. Give him 15 years and he just might be shooting music videos for Gorgoroth — providing the band members aren’t all dead or in jail.

Click “more” to watch “Metalheads.”

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Man, it’s one thing to tattoo your favorite band’s logo on your bicep, calf or even your ass, but to have something like Judas Priest’s Screaming For Vengeance logo inked on your chest is a major commitment.
Such inkjobs are prevalent at rock festivals and, of course, at Priest shows, but they’re usually not attached to an experimental, instrumental metal musician who’s more frequently compared to Isis than to anyone from the new wave of British heavy metal.

And yet, the mechanical Priest eagle belongs to Pelican guitarist Laurent Schroeder-Lebec. The dude must love Priest — either that or the tattoo artist wasn’t skilled enough to do H.R. Giger tattoos.

Pelican are currently in the middle of a U.S. tour and have dates scheduled through May 30 in Hollywood. If you go and see them, don’t shout “Freebird” between songs. Instead, cry out “You’ve Got Another Thing Comin.’” And don’t miss the online premiere of Pelican’s video for “Dead Between the Walls” next week on the Headbangers Ball Blog.

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Let us know what was cool and what sucked. But more importantly, choose one video from the list below that you definitely want to see on next week’s episode. The clip with the most votes will be included in the lineup.

Here’s what we played last week:
ARCH ENEMY - “I WILL LIVE AGAIN”
OPETH - “PORCELAIN HEART”
BEHEMOTH - “AT THE LEFT HAND OV GOD”
CAVALERA CONSPIRACY - “SANCTUARY”
JOB FOR A COWBOY - “ALTERED FROM CATECHIZATION”
OBITUARY - “EVIL WAYS”
IN FLAMES - “THE MIRROR’S TRUTH”
FIREWIND - “MERCENARY MAN”
STRAIGHT LINE STITCH - “REMISSION”
WARBRINGER - “COMBAT SHOCK”
DEATH ANGEL - “DETHRONED”
THE MARS VOLTA - “WAX SIMULACRA”
UNEARTH - “MARCH OF THE MUTES (live)”
GWEN STACY - “THE FEAR IN YOUR EYES”
DEVILDRIVER - “CLOUDS OVER CALIFORNIA”
SOILENT GREEN - “ANTIOXIDANT”
THE SWORD - “MAIDEN, MOTHER & CRONE”

Click “more” to watch the full show from May 3, 2008.

Video Stream of Headbangers Ball (5/3/2008)

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Here’s Monstrosity death growler and deviant Visual Darkness artist Mike Hrubovcac to tell us about what he’s up to and how he put together the grisly art for Mortician’s 2005 album Re-Animated Dead Flesh. Click “more” for the compete lowdown and some pretty rad pics.

I recently just got back from a month long U.S. tour with Monstrosity, Vital Remains and Forever In Terror, so unfortunately it has been a while since the last “Nightmare Visions” feature.

I’ve been too busy drinking and thrashing out, and haven’t really had the time to submit any new artwork. But during the hiatus, I thought I’d give you all a little sneak peak of what went into the now well known Mortician cover I did a couple years back.

Apart from the original digital sketch I received from the band (shown above), I decided to also pull out some “before and after” shots. Few people realize that some of my good friends actually modeled for the background zombies in this picture. I was asked to get this illustration done in a week, so I had to cram. It just so happened that my friend “Pissboy” was having a party that night, so I figured I’d take my camera and get some zombie reference shots while everyone was in a drunken stupor. Featured zombies in the back from left to right are my friends Spike, Mollboy from “Rumpelstiltskin Grinder”, Pissboy, Globe and KW.

I was going to show some “before” shots of the zombie bitch on the table, but seeing as they’re nude photos of my ex-girlfriend, I thought I’d refrain. Although, now that I think about it, having her model for a shredded, gutted corpse seems pretty fitting.

The doctor on the left was actually airbrushed totally from scratch and pieced together
from random medical reference shots I had collected, and took the most time to finagle. Many people have noted the “Day of the Dead” influence here and they are correct. I had spent several nights watching that movie while working on this illustration in an attempt to get my head totally submerged in the horror of such a scenario. Its great to hear feedback that those feelings actually came through.

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